It seems like lately I have been reading quite a few blogs about age and “age decades” – what were my forties like, how it feels to be twenty, the X Generation. I never felt compelled to discuss my age because it never really mattered to me – I was too busy living it. Being in my fifties is a completely different story however. I do not recall focusing more on my age and my age group until now.
For most of my life, I have been busy accomplishing and doing. My teenage years I spent dreaming about college and living my own life away from my parents, participating in high school activities, experimenting with many different types of teenage “rights of passage” and dreaming about the person I would become. My twenties were exciting – I became a “legal” drinker, went to college, got married and had my three children. My thirties and forties were busy raising the kids, buying, remodeling and creating a home, carpooling, discovering the joys of gardening, canning, cooking, traveling and finally going back to work after a 6 year absence…. lots going on.
As I enter my 50’s, I find myself an empty nester with increased disposable income, flexibility in daily life, an enjoyable career with leftover time to indulge myself and make decisions just for me. Sounds wonderful? I am not there yet. It just seems a bit unstructured and almost as if things have come to a screeching halt. I feel this is truly the generation when I am really creating myself yet unlike my teenage years, I do not have the luxury of time to ponder on what I want to do with the rest of my life, nor do I feel I have unlimited possibilities as I once had. Why is this so? Where is the sense I had in my twenties and early years that the possibilities were endless? I guess it is because there are some definite “age” criteria that I throw into the mix now which defines my generation with a bit of limiting structure. What exactly is that criteria?
What does 50 look like?
We are looking older. Granted, you can say that in every generation, but it becomes much more poignant in our 50’s. Each year from here on out really shows in subtle changes on our face. Going from 25 to 30 or even 40 to 45 is not that dramatic, but going from 50 to 55 certainly is. For me, noticing the subtleties in my changing body and profile make me more aware that I am getting old, that life is really fleeting, and that I had better get a move on with things because I do not have the luxury of being 20 and having MY WHOLE LIFE ahead of me – there is a bit of a sense of urgency for me.
We talk about our health more. Acquaintances die and it is not so shocking when you hear the news – it is more of an “OK, this is beginning to happen”. This makes you definitely realize how important health is to where it becomes a point of discussion. I got together for my annual reunion with my siblings recently and within the first hour we covered the usual topics – have you had a colonoscopy, what is your cholesterol level, do you have any menopause issues, how are your hot flashes, are you keeping up with yearly checkups, have you had a bone density test to determine if you have osteoporosis or not? I guess what really got me was when I received my AARP card in the mail – available for those who are 50 and older. That was a cold dose of reality right there. (although some of the discounts offered through their organization are quite substantial.)
Our parents are old and require assistance. I lost both of my parents a few years ago and it seems like friends in my age group are all going through this – our parents need to be moved to assisted living, need help at home, cannot take care of themselves, have Alzheimer’s and various other serious health issues or need ongoing health care support. This can be an eye-opening experience and another hard dose of reality that time is marching onward.
We have a hard time seeing. I laugh when I get re-acquainted with long-lost friends on Facebook and I see them wearing reading glasses in their photos – classic. It just happens. This is a completely normal part of aging that happens to everyone and is known as presbyopia. As we age, our lens becomes stiffer, making it more difficult for our muscles to change its shape. As a result, our eye can no longer have a full range of focus (accommodation). Therefore, we rely on glasses (or contacts) to do the focusing for us. The need for reading glasses is a dead giveaway for being in your 50’s.
We are bombarded with a plethora of health related commercials targeted for our age demographic. – Commercials for prescriptions; Viagra, Abilify, Lexapro, Lipotor, Crestor, Ambien, Celexa; commercials for Our Time dating sites, long term health insurance, plastic surgery, – boring but necessary. Almost all of the top 10 prescribed drugs are for the 50’s generation and up – Lipitor and Crestor, cholesterol-lowering drugs, 94.1 million prescriptions; blood pressure drugs, 87.4 million prescriptions; angina/blood pressure drugs, 57.2 million prescriptions; not to mention sleeping pills, blood thinners, and medications for diabetes and depression.
We do not have good role models and the stereotype for 50 is not that great. When I say “not good role models”, I am talking about celebrities and the people we see in the media every day who are getting noticeable plastic surgery that just makes them, well, look weird. I am not a big fan of movies geared towards our age and older – I feel we are portrayed as sexless people, basically heading towards that point in our life where we become insignificant and are really treated like children. I am not a fan of the movies that show older adults trying to resurrect youth – Last Vegas to name one. I find it rather embarrassing.
OK – not to be a wet blanket with all this “stuff” but I do feel the above list weighs on my decision-making opportunities nowadays. I feel bombarded with it. Let us start stressing and pushing the positive emotions and emotional perks that this decade is bringing. Try to never say NO and embrace new things – it’s okay! Wisdom, experience, vision, realism, practicality, and the “nothing is taken for granted” attitude prevail over anything else. I just wish they would prevail in the general public’s eyes – imagine what a wonderful world! Just sayin…..
Life Experiences Add Up 