ORDINARY JANUARY

January has been challenging. I usually look forward to the new year, when the hectic pace of the holiday is in the rearview mirror, allowing me more time to focus on nesting, self-care, and slowing down. January is an oasis in the calendar year. It can offer a new beginning for many – New Year’s resolutions are implemented, dry January becomes a goal for those who give up booze for the month to reset, exercise habits develop, and healthy eating gets pushed to the forefront. Parties and get-togethers rarely happen nor sound fun, and the desire to hunker down and get to know yourself defines the month. These rituals that we attempt to resonate for the year are why I have loved January for so long. My beloved “get to know you” month is a bit of an anomaly for me now as I’m struggling to get through.

How did I get here – somewhat miserable in my favorite month of the year? I can point to coming off of a pandemic, for starters. Stuck inside with limited outside activities seemed like a never-ending January. I had all the time in the world ahead of me, looming on the horizon. Coming home from work meant turning off my computer in my home office and heading into the evening with many choices for spending my time. Being confined to home for so long started out as a luxury I embraced with fervor, but that luxury turned into a feeling of being stuck. After spending the better part of two years traveling less, socializing and entertaining less, along with a slow down of life in general, soaking up what January offers – spending countless hours on the couch with a good book and time to fill, is no longer a treat. My pastimes are just that – a way to pass the time until 10 pm, so I can go to bed. What I looked forward to so much has become more of a way to fill the spaces of my everyday, ordinary life. These gems that life provides stopped being shiny and bright and took on a dull tone.

Lounging around and working on reinventing myself is no longer a treat because, quite simply, I have all the time in the world to do just that. I found that I don’t need January to provide this for me. Life comprises quiet moments, long days, and routine for all of us – day in and day out. Age is a huge factor as I no longer have little kids who demand so much from us. But even for those who have little ones and active lives after work hours, life can get a bit stale when it revolves around the same set of circumstances. The daily grind can get old for anyone, especially in January, when the world is supposed to be born anew, and we find ourselves in a rut.

Downtime like this of any sort is really just living. It brings to the forefront that blessed with ample time, most of us are not jet setting across the world or going on expensive shopping sprees – most of us are faced with the fact that our lives are not that exciting. But what accompanies exciting – stress and drama, are not sustainable or healthy ways to live – and that’s the rub. We crave intensity and constant activity to fill the spaces, but simplicity is really where it’s at. We all need this time when things seem simple to find joy in them. That first cup of coffee in the morning, putting the kids on the school bus, being home with such regularity to actually meal plan, and enjoying those crockpot sloppy joes is nothing more than a privilege. Watering plants, reading at night, grabbing that Saturday morning mocha, kissing your partner in the morning, talking about your day, and walking around the neighborhood are not toxic activities. Ordinary and mundane are the nuts and bolts of what life is – the simple puzzle pieces that create our framework of living when put together.

January will leave us in a few short days, and February will be the gateway to slightly warmer weather, more opportunities to be busy, and more hustle and bustle to life. If we play our cards right, we can reflect on these last few precious weeks where we felt as if our lives were dull and ordinary and hold them to a higher standard. The expression “Plain-Jane” comes to mind, which means nothing more than ordinary, nothing fancy or glamorous. At least outwardly, being a “Plain-Jane” is what most of life is about. Navigating the same old is enriching to our lives and makes us who we are. Work to keep this special. Trust me – the ordinary is what you will miss when life gets hectic.