Get my shit together

OK – I don’t like to swear while writing but I cannot find another equivalent for the expression “get my shit together.”  It just doesn’t have the same meaning  for me to say “I have to get myself mentally organized.”  Here I sit on a Saturday morning, having gotten hot yoga in, an hours worth of yard work done, and now, a cup of coffee and ready to begin my “connections” with the world –  touching base with my girlfriends via text, checking work emails, writing this blog post, checking Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Stumbling, of course!  I’m getting it together baby!

Why is this relevant to being a “fifty something”?  What makes me break out in a sweat and shoot my stress level through the roof if I don’t keep up with all of this readily available communication?  I think  it’s because my generation, as in generations prior, lost touch with friends from the past simply due to geography and the wearing away of time and to suddenly have a way to be instantly connected to high school and college friends, and basically the world, is exciting.  Studies show that approximately 28 million people over the age of 45, are using Facebook, approximately 39% of their users – that explains a lot right there.

This instant ability to connect has the younger generation wondering how we communicated “back in the day”.  My daughter recently asked me, how did we connect with friends  when we went out for the night?  How did we pull together a social evening without Facebook, Twitter and texting?  I simply answered that we called everyone up, picked a place to meet, and stood guard at the meeting place until everyone showed up.  The “be there or be  square” concept.  It worked pretty well.  I like to think it made us all the more accountable.

Accountability is my middle name, so I feel a sense of having to be accountable with all the pieces of my life that are floating out on the internet in this day and age (FB, Twitter, etc..)  Odd as it may sound, but I feel like I have to keep in touch.  The capability is there,  I am a social person, so it all makes sense that I take a morning or sometimes a whole day to “get my shit together” – putting all the pieces of my social connectiveness together to therefore feel more complete.  As I press “publish” on this post – I feel a sense of relief.  I can cross “blog today” off my list.  Now that just leaves me with…..

I Have Nothing to Wear!

Do you stare at all the clothes in your closet and say “I don’t have anything to wear”?  That, dear reader, is classic me – how often I have uttered these words when surveying  my many, many, clothes.  I have so many items stuffed in my closet  that my poor husband has taken up residence for his clothing in the spare bedroom.

I guess it’s not that I don’t have anything to wear, it’s that I found myself not liking my wardrobe as much anymore – it felt less and less like “me” the older I’ve gotten.   For the first time in my life, I found myself feeling, “I’m too old to wear this”, or “I’m showing too much leg”, or worse yet – this is too low-cut!”  I simply did not feel as comfortable in items I used to wear, and I knew it was time for me to find a new level of comfort.

I initially felt sad that I didn’t like my clothes anymore, as if I had no options for a style for this new decade I’m entering.  My daughter suggested to me that I research clothing styles for older women.  I found this encouraging, and in doing so, I came across some great ideas for clothes that do look good and that make me feel good when I wear them.  Older women can look fabulous and dressing for your age only enhances your attractiveness.  Here are just a few items that make me feel good when I wear them and that really look fabulous on!

Try a sheath dress on for size ( the sheath dress is cut close to the body. The waist is defined. The skirt fits snugly—either straight or like a pencil skirt. Its length is typically at the knee or slightly below or above it.)  Below is a great sheath dress from White House Black Market

Another great item that is a must have is a sweater wrap.  Watch this video clip from Susan Bigsby, image consultant for eHow – she does a wonderful job demonstrating just how to wear a sweater wrap.  This one pictured below is from Kaboodle.com

Try a short flowing mini-dress with leggings and ballerina flats .  Pictured below is a reader from the Fabulous After 40  website showing just that look:

Trust me – these three items are just the tip of the iceberg.  There are dozens of combinations of clothes that enhance a women’s beauty and body shape for the over 50 crowd, and dozens of websites to help you find them.

As Coco Chanel said so eloquently:
“Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.”

So – go ahead and merit your face and enhance your body image with a sense of style that works for you!

Where to Land?

We are moving our daughter, Katie, to Boise, Idaho. Having traveled quite a bit in my life, I go to many places, but the “west” in America, that is new turf to me.  As a child, I visited the west on family vacations, the usual hot spots –  Yellowstone, Grand Canyon, Grand Tetons – but I never spent any length of time in a city to get to know it.  It wasn’t until Katie lived in Salt Lake City for three years that  we got to know the flavor of a western city.

Now it’s Boise.  I am struck by how lovely it is here.  I love wide open spaces – I must be one of the few who love the drive across Nebraska.  I let my mind wander about days long gone,  how the area must have looked back then, how quiet and peaceful it must have been, with the moonlight being the only light at night, how underpopulated things were. I am attracted to this lonely landscape, it is breathable room for me.  As we were flying into Boise, the view from the air was breathtakingly simple with land-forms, trees, lakes, and rivers being the only noticeable things.  You can really see the topography from the air when there are few cities and suburbs distorting the landscape.

As we were sitting in a pub last night (Boise is full of them – the downtown is charming, easy to walk around, and most restaurants have outdoor seating), I found myself thinking about where I wanted to land, so to speak.  I could, theoretically  decide to move here.  My daughter, being in her early 20’s, goes where the job is, as do most young people, as did I.   Being in my early fifties, I am nearing a point in my life where I can choose and decide for myself – where to I want to live?   I actually said the words ” I have 20 good years left”.  That sounds so limiting and fatalistic, but it is the truth.  I don’t know if I’m going to have my health and feel great in my 70’s so I want to make the most of my 50’s and 60’s.

The conversation steered towards where to spend these next 20 years. Yes – I have found that I feel comfortable in the west and I really like it, but scenery doesn’t love you back now does it?  What if I move somewhere for the lifestyle and find out I can’t stand the people?   I have such wonderful friends and family in the Chicago area –  do I give all that up to go somewhere because it’s pretty?   Will I completely transform myself and discover a new part of me by living in an area that I like?   It was liberating to talk about – we spend our whole lives going to where the job is, working 40+ hours per week, and to feel the freedom and the responsibility of deciding just exactly where we want to land is overwhelming.  It made me feel privileged.

This is such good food for thought and such a motivator – choosing for myself how to spend the rest of my life.  Cool beans.